Long Cool Women with Big Feet

Fringe 2013 Review for 4 Truths and a Lie

audrey — Mon, 20 May 2013 05:03:23 +0000

My other show, 4 Truths and a Lie was reviewed on opening night by Fire Down Below. Thanks guys!

Obsessively Okay Orlando Sentinel AND Weekly Review – 2013 Orlando Fringe

audrey — Fri, 17 May 2013 19:21:37 +0000

I had a preview performance of Obsessively Okay for the 2013 Orlando International Fringe Festival. I received a GREAT review from the Orlando Weekly AND the Orlando Sentinel!

To read the ORLANDO WEEKLY review on the web, click here. To read the ORLANDO SENTINEL review on the web, click here.

It’s What You Wanted Ed Harley

audrey — Sat, 11 May 2013 16:34:35 +0000

Well, I am on my way to the 2013 Orlando International Fringe Festival. My show Obsessively Okay is plugging along. My costumes are fantastic. Constructed and made by Threadbare Jen (@threadbarejen). I can’t wait to see how they look with full make-up and hair.

Brian Bradley has been an amazing director, I’m a lucky girl and I can’t give enough praise to Matt and Megan Soule.

Rehearsals are going well considering we had a very small rehearsal period. My brain is so fried right now from memorizing a 16 page monologue and blocking for a 35-40 minute show.

This Is What You Wanted Ed Harley

It certainly is. Like I said, I’m completely fried but very excited to put up my very first solo show that I have written and produced. Not to mention that I have ANOTHER show at the Fringe, 5 Truths and a Lie’s offspring: 4 Truths and a Lie.

For that show, I wrangled 35 storytellers and their schedules and now we have 7 shows, 7 themes and 35 storytellers.

Things are crazy, ya’ll! I’m gonna see if I can nap on this plane. Hope you like these sneak peek photos!

Tickets for Obsessively Okay are here

Tickets for 4 Truths and a Lie are here

Come out and see us, Orlando!

Obsessively Okay Show Poster

audrey — Tue, 30 Apr 2013 00:28:05 +0000

Here’s the poster for my Orlando International Fringe Festival show. I’ll be performing Obsessively Okay in May! Can’t wait.

Buy tickets here.

Join actress/writer Audrey Kearns (Discount Comedy Outlet/5 Truths and A Lie) on her hilarious journey through the magical and wondrous world of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Please arrive neat and clean!

Buy tickets here.

5 Truths and a Lie/4 Truths and a Lie 2013 Orlando International Fringe Festival Print Materials!

audrey — Sun, 28 Apr 2013 18:35:58 +0000

I Rocked It in the ’80s

audrey — Thu, 11 Apr 2013 00:16:31 +0000

This is how me and the big sis rolled back in the day!

Portlandia, Imma Coming For You!

audrey — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 01:01:20 +0000

I’m heading up to Portandia with Brian, to host 5 Truths and a Lie with the amazing storytelling show Back Fence PDX. The show will be on Saturday, April 5 at 8pm and is almost sold out! Then, on April 6 we’ll also be participating in what sounds like an amazing good time: Story Russian Roulette. For more info on the shows and tix, click here.

Follow me on Twitter here.

Follow 5 Truths and a Lie on Twitter here.

Follow Back Fence PDX here.

I Am Here

audrey — Fri, 29 Mar 2013 23:21:02 +0000

Yeesh! I’ve been doing a terrible job of keeping this site going.

I am in the middle of the busiest time in my life, which is great but also awful. It takes a lot of mental strength to get one task done a day let alone 5!

I’m producing 2 shows right now and writing one. I’m writing one called Obsessively Okay about my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Writing about it, even though what I’m writing is funny, has made me run away from all kinds of communication. I’ve always joked about my OCD but having to actually write about it and then read it and then re-write it has been a depressing experience. I’ve always chosen to look at the funny side of my disorder but now that I have stepped away from it while writing, it has made me sad. It is a hard disorder to deal with and I struggle with it every day–I actually didn’t realize that until I tackled this project.

Anyway, I ‘m back. Gonna keep on keepin’ on–I’ve got to. The alternative is being a scaredy cat which is the comfort zone I’m trying to destroy. DESTROY!!!

People Watching

audrey — Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:54:45 +0000

My favorite moments are the ones I have with myself. I’m not talking about Walden Pond aloneness. I’m talking about being alone amongst many. Sitting at a table in an outdoor café where the tables are a little too close to the road for comfort but we sit there anyway to give ourselves the illusion of being on a Paris street or in an Italian square. I sit, sip my latte and inhale the fragrant exhaust fumes that hang over me. I look at the people. I imagine where they are going to, are they in a hurry? Or is it their day off? Are they sad or is this a good time in their lives? The best of times? There’s a man with a toddler sitting at a nearby table. He has no control over the boy, the boy doesn’t listen to a word his dad says. Is he a divorced dad who only has his child twice a month. He probably doesn’t like to discipline since he never gets to see his boy. Or maybe he’s a disaffected dad and this is a chore. Maybe he isn’t this kid’s dad? Mom’s new boyfriend? Hell, maybe the boy doesn’t even belong to him. Maybe his parents aren’t paying attention to him and they’re that forty something couple over there with their ipads, iphones and perfect little dog they made the waitress bring a bowl of water for. Oh look, a redhead’s crossing the street…

follow me on twitter here.

Gliding on a Feather

audrey — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 19:32:36 +0000

I like to kayak on a calm, warm and kind ocean. It’s a most peaceful experience. I feel as if I am gliding over crystal clear water on a feather. Silence everywhere. The only sound is the oar breaking through the waters surface, then the swoosh as I power through my stroke and finally the slice I hear as the water releases the blade of the oar. As I circle the oar to meet the water again, drops like warm summer rain fall on my bare body immediately drying in the sun, leaving salt stained skin. So very far away from the shore, and with not a person in sight, I rest the oar across my lap and inhale the clean air and smell the pungent fragrance of seaweed. I lick the salt off my lips and feel it trickle down my throat tasting like sour sweat on a hot day. I smile. I relax. I lose myself completely in gazing through the transparent water to the bottom of the sea. Is the bottom five feet away? Ten? Thirty? The bright sand on the bottom has become a screen for the sun’s kaleidoscope of patterned light. I’m startled back into the present when I see the sun’s reflection off the silvery scaly skin of a darting fish. Not sure where I went, but knowing it was absolutely perfect.

Follow me on twitter HERE